As Krish and Mel crossed into Scotland en route to John O’Groats on their bicycles, SayYesMore founder Dave decided to remind himself about adventure and headed north to surprise his friends.
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adventure
We all find different ways of feeling refreshed and putting a little adventure into our day, something to take you away from it all for a short while, and for some people in this group recently it has been wild swimming!
One member of the YesTribe posted this week that she had said yes to a sea swim despite the less than perfect weather, and I loved this! There are days when the weather is cold, windy, grey, rainy…but we still have that need for a little refreshing activity in nature, and let’s face it – the sun doesn’t always shine.
Of course, I admit, when the weather is what we often refer to as ‘miserable’, I do sometimes decide to have a cosy day indoors and watch the world outside the window! But most often, if I need nature and the weather is less than perfect, nothing stops me and I take myself out to enjoy the elements.
My partner once picked me up from my place of work – an office at the time – after a bad day and he drove me to the beach. We stripped to our underwear as we had no swimming stuff, and raced each other into the water for a chilly swim, then drove home wearing nothing but our massive hoodies which we had in the van as we had no towels either! It was totally spontaneous – he knew I needed it, and god did it make us happy. I totally forgot about my bad day.
Enjoying the elements
I remember swimming in rivers and lakes on so many camping trips as a child, and they were the best holidays! It was so exciting to jump into the water in the middle of nature, or walk down streams just to explore and see where they lead! One of our members, Emma, ended up going for a wild swim this week after being invited by another YesTriber, and decided to take her kids too!
I think this kind of thing is just awesome for kids – there’s something magical about releasing them into the wild, so to speak! The magic of nature, the freedom, the escape, the fresh air and fresh water! I think kids benefit massively from spending time in nature and it’s so great to see them exploring and enjoying the elements.
The kindness of strangers
I read a post this week which was asking members to remember times when a complete stranger had helped them during their travels or adventures.
Sue Wallace spoke of two occasions on her travels where some kind strangers had insisted on helping her – these strangers had invited Sue into their family home when she had been stuck for a place to stay in a different country, and they asked for nothing in return. On one occasion, Sue chose to walk two hours with the stranger’s son to help collect water, and realised the scale of their generosity where a family who did not have much, still shared what they had with her.
People who have little, still give kindness
The truth is, adventures are not always smooth sailing. There are times when things do not turn out as planned or you end up a little stuck. Although we often deal with the situation the best we can and try to smile through it, there is nothing more comforting than the kindness of a stranger to relight your spirits!
When you are stuck somewhere unfamiliar or in a situation where you can’t move forward (we’ve all had a puncture and no repair kit at some point…right?) and a stranger approaches to help you, it just lights you up inside I think. These people make everything so much better at times when we don’t expect it, and at times when we need it.
If you see someone who looks lost, stuck, or even sad – try to offer something, whether it’s a favour or just a friendly smile. You don’t know how much of a difference you could make to that person’s day.
Some of you shared some photos of a real need to bring the outdoors indoors this week – we saw some very clever little setups of miniature toy people travelling about in some home-made ‘outdoor’ settings! Bringing those places we can’t get to closer to home, and on an entirely different scale!
I naturally love the outdoors and I can feel a little claustrophobic if the natural lighting is low indoors during the day – my mum thinks I’m a little strange for constantly turning the lights on when it’s ‘not even dark’, and my partner battles with the fact that I MUST have the curtains open first thing in the morning until the very last trickle of light has disappeared at night! I think a lot of people need to have the connection to the outdoors and nature to feel better in their mental state, and it’s pretty clear that many of you do too.
Sitting in the conservatory, looking out to the garden and the grey skies, listening to the rain on the roof – I came here to enjoy the outside, inside, while I write. Despite the dull yet natural light and the ‘miserable’ weather, I find it very refreshing!
After reading over some of my notes from this week’s YesTribe posts, I got the vibe that many of you are craving that same ‘refreshing’ feeling…
It’s all in your head
There has been a lot of talk amongst us this week of questioning your current path or finding/creating a new one.
One lady opened up to the group about the fact that she has decided to build her own business, and the sense of achievement she felt just from making that decision.
Alison’s post (https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10159408341934179&set=gm.1466002960249794) showed that by simply shifting your mindset from, “I’d love to do that” to, “I am going to do this”, makes a big difference in how you feel, and is the first simple step to getting you started on that path you’ve always wanted to walk down. As Alison said – you will feel you have achieved something just by changing something in your head.
Many of us are looking for new horizons
Another member also spoke about how she’d been questioning her path for months, before finally taking the first step in making a change. In Alessandra’s post she shared her belief that doing what you love can pave the way for everything else, but that we can also often face difficulties when trying to follow our hearts.
I can relate to this completely. Feeling stuck in no-man’s land when it comes to what is priority and what is important to you personally, finding the balance, and often thinking you’re the only one who feels stuck, while everyone else appears to know exactly what path they’re on and are confidently skipping down it while you’re still trying to figure out which way up the map is!
What is it they say? One day, or day one…you decide. We all have ideas and dreams in our heads – if you followed your head and your heart, where would you go? What would you do? What is possible? You may think all this stuff needs or deserves to be on the back burner when actually, if you combed through all your piles of lists and ideas, you may find something that is indeed possible.
Adventurous souls
I think we can all agree that we all have a little soft spot for adventure…okay a massive soft spot! Maybe even a little obsession?!
You guys have had a big case of itchy feet recently and have been trying to incorporate adventure into your everyday lives, which is undoubtedly a great way to be! I think it’s safe to say we all need it right now.
One lovely lady has set herself a mission of having ‘an adventure a day’ – sometimes this means walking barefoot in the rain, sometimes it means having a little self-made spa day at home! Ola’s daily acts have been reminding us that adventures come in all shapes and sizes.
Another lady put her life in your hands by asking for your adventure ideas to throw in a hat, from which she would randomly pick a couple to go ahead with! We also had someone asking for some suggestions on how to shake things up a bit when feeling stuck in a rut trying to keep things adventurous with her 2-year-old.
You see, we all have that need for adventure in what becomes everyday life, and sometimes we need a little help in keeping the dust off our souls – something to keep life exciting and keep us on our toes!
Incredible beach art
We had an incredible photo from one of our members this week who had managed to create a giant pattern in the sand on a beach…using just a rake and some rope!! I was amazed at what he’d done, and it did make me think; if this man can go out for a stroll and make a piece of art like that with just some basic things from the back of the shed, then I think we can all make something beautiful with what we have.
Trying new things can be daunting. There’s that little part of you that always says, ‘what if this happens?’ or ‘what if that happens?’. I’m sure everybody has it and at some point it will have stopped every one of us from doing something we probably should have done. Be bold and brave. Give it a go! Be prepared, but do that thing you’ve always wanted to do and you might just discover, like us, that most of the worries we have are nothing like the reality (for the better!).
It was during a trip to Wales that we visited the National Showcaves centre. We had talked about caving, but neither of us really imagined that we’d be crawling around in tunnels that were dark, wet and only just wider than our shoulders anytime soon.
“Would you ever try caving properly? I wonder how you’d get into something like that”
“Perhaps you’d have to join a club? I’m not sure if they’d be very VI (visually impaired) friendly and it’s probably dark and cold’’
A few weeks later, we met Fraser, an outdoor instructor who seems to love being wet, cold and jumping off things into pools of water. We also found out that he’s a keen caver, working towards one of his qualifications, and he invited us to go caving with him ‘some time’. We all know that when somebody says ‘some time’ it usually never materialises, but not so with Fraser. A few weeks later we met him in the Inglesport Café (a place where cavers seem to hang out) in North Yorkshire. We sat down with a cup of tea, looked over a map and discussed plans. He seemed to have considered the fact that John can’t see, so we confidently left the café to collect our equipment.
We drove to the cave, got kitted up and felt super toasty in our bright red suits (a feeling that was to be short lived!) We reached the cave entrance; a fast flowing stream that disappeared into darkness. We put our head torches on, scrambled around holding on to the sides while we waded through the stream. We laid on a flat rock and entered a small tunnel. Lauren went first, John was in the middle and Fraser was at the back.
The route into the cave was tricky. Lauren guided John over steep sections where he sometimes used his hands too to feel the steps and rocks he had to negotiate.
The tunnel wasn’t much wider than our shoulders and moving was a struggle. We’d gone perhaps ten metres down the tunnel and John said “I’m not sure I can do this. I think I may be slightly claustrophobic.” The tunnel seemed to widen, so we continued a little further, which is when Fraser realised that we’d taken a wrong turn. We went back through the twisty tunnel, back through the puddles and just 20mins into our caving career, we were wet, cold, had wellies full of water and were unsure as to whether or not we should call it a day.
We didn’t. John decided that as long as we didn’t have to ‘belly crawl’ too much, he could give it another try. Fortunately, things were much better down the right path and we were almost enjoying ourselves. It was a challenge for us. There were deep pools in places, key hand holds and lots to hit your head on, all of which John had a hard time seeing (his 3% vision becomes zero in the dark). Considering John was the first blind person Fraser had taken caving, he did a superb job of guiding.
We reached a place known as ‘Dolly tubs’ (a series of deep pools of water with just a small ledge of rock between) which needed crossing before reaching the abseil point. Fraser worked some magic with the ropes and told us what to do. The descent was pretty interesting. It was incredibly wet for starters! John had to take out his hearing aids but luckily, he still seemed to be able to hear thanks to the cave acoustics. It was a bit daunting dangling on a rope between walls of rock and a waterfall, but we made it down to ‘Allum Pot’ which was an opening in the cave. It was a great view, and one that we’d worked hard for, but getting there had taken a while and it was all too soon time to turn back.
Lauren ready to abseil down the waterfall of doom (not it's actual name!)
Allum pot. We made it to an opening in the cave where you could see a waterfall dropping from a stream above ground.
‘Back’ involved ascending up the rope we’d previously abseiled on. It was tough and the water flowing on to our heads felt icy cold. The extra weight of the water in our wellies wasn’t at all welcome while we were trying to haul ourselves back up the rope with our climbing kit. We did it, but our hands were numb, we were soaked through to our undies and we were freezing cold. We upped the pace to warm back up and retraced our steps towards the cave exit. Daylight! Feeling the warmth of the outside air was incredibly welcome.
Lauren guiding John out of the rocky cave entrance
“How was that?” asked Fraser
“HORRIBLE!”
It was almost everything we were worried about. But would we do it again?
Most probably*
*in a drier and slightly less squeezy cave
The route in was muddy. Lauren and John both wearing red caving suits, wellies and helmets.
While caving for us fell firmly in the ‘Type 2 fun’ category, it was a great experience all the same and we look back on it surprisingly fondly. We had worries and doubts before giving it a go but what was true for this little adventure and as it is with nearly all others: the stuff we were worrying about beforehand wasn’t at all the stuff that gave us problems! We didn’t get trapped underground and have to cut off one of our limbs, but we never expected that John would be claustrophobic!
The lesson in all of this – don’t worry too much and definitely don’t let those worries stop you from stepping out of your comfort zone or saying yes. Things won’t always go to plan, but it’s part of the adventure and often the bit we talk (or laugh) about and remember the most. Problems will occur, but they are rarely insurmountable. We deal with problems all of the time and there’s some great comfort to be had in being able to think ‘I know problems are going to happen, I don’t yet quite know what they are but I’m prepared and I will probably be able to handle them’.
Check out the T-Shirt Twins’ video for more details on their caving adventure - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKDDrjgTrso
I need to make a confession: until yesterday I do not think I really understood the word ‘adventure’. It’s quite embarrassing really. I call myself an Adventure Advocate. I produce a podcast called Seize Your Adventure. I ask all of my guests what ‘adventure’ means to them. And yet, when people ask me what adventure is, and more importantly how to have one, I could not quite get the explanation right.
You see, the word ‘adventure’ is like the word ‘love’. It is a poor signifier of a feeling that is difficult to explain. I have heard it described by multiple people in similar but differing ways. “Adventure is a mindset… it makes you feel all the emotions… it feeds your soul…it’s uncomfortable but worth it”. None of these description are wrong. If you know adventure, you know exactly what they mean. But how do you describe adventure to those who do not have it? How do you advocate for something so intangible?
The first time I remember feeling adventure, I was seven years old. My family went on the first of many holidays to Snowdonia. We drove across the country from our home in the South. My mum and dad would share the long drive and my older sister and me would sit in the back with our rescue dog between us. The day of travelling was filled with cassette tapes and car games, and the landscapes outside the car windows became increasingly unknown. It was a holiday in Britain - my own country - and yet we crossed over a border that bought a new language into my life for the first time. I remember us giggling at the Welsh word ARAF, teasing the dog with the bark-like word for SLOW. We walked into slate mines and rode trains along the coast. The day we walked up Snowdon, we stepped into the cloud and I never reached the top because I was too scared of the wind and rain. It was the epitome of a family adventure holiday.
Red dragon mascot sits on wet, mossy rocks in a foggy mountain landscape in Snowdonia.
Since then, I have felt adventure many times: when I’ve stood on glaciers; when I’ve navigated Spanish streets; when I’ve pushed my body to keep walking in the hope of a bed. Yesterday, I felt adventure again. It might not have looked like much from the outside. It was a simple walk through the parks and commons near my house. There was no terrifying weather. I was not walking across a foreign country. I came home for lunch. So what made it adventurous?
It was the fact that I put myself into a situation that invited the unexpected. I did not plan my path (I rarely do) but instead took tangents where I felt like it (the confines of the common kept me safe!). I stopped to watch a robin trilling his song on top of a post. I was surprised by the spider that had taken a seat on my water bottle. I giggled at the charcoal burner that had the name ‘Norman’ embossed on the side and wondered if all charcoal burners have names. And best of all, I found myself far enough away from the bank holiday crowds that I surprised a doe on my path and had a frozen moment of mutual acknowledgement before she bounded off into the bushes.
A black SayYesMore water bottle slants across half the photo, the other half is a blurry white and green spring landscape
As I enjoyed this feeling of adventure just miles from my own home, I thought about how to capture the feeling and explain to others how they can find it themselves. And the easiest suggestion I have to is take yourself away from human-made comfort and out into uncontrollable nature. When you do that, you put yourself in situations where the unexpected will occur. You open yourself up to adventure.
And like love, you’ll know it when you find it.